Color Me Butterfly

Have you been following the unwritten rules that cause you to be “stuck”?  Does this sound like you?

• Look for someone or something to blame whenever you procrastinate?
• Host frequent pity parties for yourself reinforcing your ‘self worthlessness’?
• Never listening to your inner voice?
• Words like coulda, shoulda, woulda are always at the tip of your tongue?
• Make any problem an obstacle; make molehills into mountains?
• Allow negative thoughts to consume you?
• Try to control everything, especially those things that are not worth controlling?
• Being dependent instead of independent?
• Acting impulsively – never using critical thinking?

Recently I came across an article entitled “Getting Unstuck”.  The title alone caught my eye.  The article suggested that if you want your life to be different you have to try a new approach.  Getting unstuck is being able to move beyond a past dilemma to a current action.   The idea is to shift your thoughts by evaluating your behaviors. 

What can you do to become ‘unstuck’?

• Acknowledge a problem and seek resolution.  Too often, most of us spend way too much time consumed by stuff that’s already happened.  Whew! That is me all the way, but I am working to improve it.  I’ve learned that obsessing about the past is never going to change it.  I love this quote which pretty much sums it up for me:  “You will get unstuck if you can accept that the past is gone and the future is a dream – one is history; the other mystery.” 
  
• Recognize patterns.  Patterns are an unconscious way of coping.  We have to ask ourselves:  Have I done this before?  Is this working for me?  Think about the last time you were really happy.  What patterns were you following at that time? 
• Self Awareness.  We have to understand ourselves to evaluate what makes us happy.  I used to think this was so corny.  But if you were to assess yourself, you will be able to push through the nonsense and pinpoint the truth.  Write down your goals, your dreams, your desires, and what lifts your spirits.
  
• Know your limitations.  Becoming aware of our weaknesses helps us to determine where our defenses lie.  If you become aware of your insecurities, you will be less defensive about them.  That will be the catalyst to continued improvement and growth. 
  
• Embrace change.  Practice this by making a change tomorrow from something you usually do today.  For example, instead of driving to work, take the train.  You never know where it will lead you.

Now, if you’re anything like me - someone who is complacent, and sometimes  discouraged by the mundane and the status  quo - you need to get started now.  Put these suggestions into action.  Be on your way to becoming unstuck.  I am!

Pamela Lawson
Jacksonville, Florida