Color Me Butterfly

I remember telling my father that I wanted to be a Doctor when I grew up, but not a medical doctor and he asked: “What for?” I don't recall answering him, just that scene, and his words “What for?”  It was those words that slowed me down and became my obstacle.  And it is those very words that later encouraged me to become a Doctor, to change lives including my own.

Currently, I am enrolled in a full time Doctoral program, work full time and am the mother of a twelve year old daughter. I tend to not use the term "single mother", although I have no opposition to those who wear that title like the badge of honor that it is. However, in my opinion, titles can sometimes limit us, allowing people to look at us in only one light. I am a mother; and personally, I can't see doing things any other way – single or otherwise.

I graduated with my Bachelors degree in 1986. My plan had always been to go back for my Masters Degree, and later, my Doctorate Degree. After graduation, months eventually turned into years. Then, it was eight years after graduation and I was having a baby. There was also the nagging question, "What would I do with these degrees if I had them?" Eventually, I followed my dream of bettering the lives of others and am now a Social Worker.  I plan to lead, to teach and to guide others in realizing their full potential.

In making the decision to return to school, I made a promise to my daughter and myself:  her life and her involvement in activities would not change. I continue to help her with homework, host sleepovers, holiday dinners and family celebrations.  I never miss a school performance nor swim meet all the while carpooling kids to dance, swimming and other events when it’s my turn.  In my home, I fix what's broken, cook, clean, and do whatever else it takes to run a household.

I don't know that juggling is a good word for me.  I have made a conscious decision to persevere, just as our foremothers have done.  Each one of us has a story to share, but what's important is that we learn from it – good or bad. I know that at times it seems the bad may never stop.  But, although it's easier said than done, it does stop. Use your strength to juggle – to knock down your obstacles and claim your dream.

Shawn A. Evans, MBA
Philadelphia, PA