Color Me Butterfly

Recently, I was enthralled by a program that I watched on PBS featuring Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, the internationally renowned self development author and speaker.  Dr. Dyer authored the book entitled Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life!   I was fascinated by Dr. Dyer’s message because I could relate to his message about how by changing your thoughts, you can change your life – in any situation – including abuse.

As a domestic violence survivor, I wholeheartedly support the idea of changing your thoughts to change your life.  At least I can say that changing my thoughts was key to my becoming a victor and no longer a victim.  Meaning, I needed to reprogram my mind and rebuild my self worth and self esteem – take back my power – if I was ever going to get out of that abusive relationship.

Oftentimes when I speak to a group, I usually share the story of a time when I was an eight-month pregnant battered young woman.  In this story, I tell of how one day while sitting on my porch and realizing that I was one of many young women who was in the same predicament – pregnant, battered and feeling alone – and realizing that I was them, and they were me – it was at that lowest point, in that very instant, I made the decision to change my thoughts and ultimately, my life. 

Shortly after that, my life began to change -- I got out of that situation, raised my daughter, put myself through school, became a senior executive at a well known global company, and later an award winning author -- and I have never looked back… except to share my experiences and inspire other women. 

Someone once said:  “You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you."

By no means am I suggesting that anyone in an abusive relationship is responsible for being there.  Actually, I’m suggesting the opposite… that though we are not responsible for someone else’s actions against us, we do have the power to change our circumstances.  And change first begins with our thoughts.

I believe that the first step to breaking free of an abusive relationship is accomplished first by removing any thoughts that you deserve to be mistreated, or that you’re unworthy of a healthy relationship.  Let changing your thoughts be the first step in the healing process. 

I encourage you to change your thoughts and you will inevitably Change Your Life!